Thank you so much for reaching out to us with this question! We are glad you are learning and asking questions about your body. It’s totally normal to have different feelings about your body – including negative ones. Every single person has a powerful, personal, constantly changing relationship with the body they wake up in every morning.
In particular, it can be confusing and sometimes upsetting to grow up with body parts that society often associates with sex, pregnancy, and childbirth. When we are taught about breasts, uteruses, vulvas, and vaginas, we are taught at the same time about what they are “supposed” to do. In truth, you are not “supposed” to do anything at all! Your body belongs to you, and to you alone. You get to chose how you move in your body, whether that means having sex, not having sex, or simply existing.
You mentioned a wish that your chest was flat. This feeling is shared by many people. It helps to think of your body as a home you live in every day – what do you need to make your body feel like home? For people exploring nonbinary and transgender identities, or people who just prefer to have a flatter chest, safe chest binding is an option to explore. Sometimes different types of bras (like a sports bra) can provide better support.
Some people have concerns about their chest size due to physical concerns like breast/chest tissue pain, back pain, or limitations to exercise. You can talk with your health care provider if you are experiencing any of these concerns.
Finally, if it feels safe for you to do so, we encourage you to reach out to your health care provider and/or a trusted adult with your thoughts and feelings about your body. No matter what, you are normal, valid, and brave to be exploring how to make your body feel like home.