How do you tell your parents that you’re pregnant?

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pregnant stomachIf you’re pregnant, it’s important for you to get health care as soon as possible so you can learn about your options. It’s best to get support from your parent(s), guardian(s), or another trusted adult. If you’re concerned about your safety, or afraid to tell them, you can talk to an adult first who you feel close to, or your health care provider. You can then decide whether you want the trusted adult or your health care provider to be with you when you tell them. You may decide to talk with your parent(s)/guardian(s) about making a decision about your pregnancy, or you may prefer to think about your options first, and then talk with them.

  1. If possible, talk to one or both parents.
  2. If you don’t have a trusted adult to talk to such as an aunt, or grandparent, you may find it comforting to talk to an older sister or friend first. You could even practice what you’re going say to your parents.
  3. Pick a time when you and your parents are relaxed, when you’re NOT rushing out the door and NEVER tell them this kind of news during an argument.
  4. Be clear, calm and straightforward, “Mom, Dad, I’m pregnant.”
  5. Parents react differently but it’s common for them to be upset or disappointed at first. Allow them their feelings and time to let the news sink in.
  6. Your parent(s) first reaction may be negative or hurtful. Try not to take their reactions personally. Things may be said initially that are hurtful but that doesn’t mean they won’t support you.
  7. Save the discussion about what you want to do for a later time. It’s better to wait until everyone has cooled off before talking about what you feel is the best thing to do- continuing or terminating the pregnancy, or adoption.
  8. Parents or other adults, friends or your partner may try to pressure you into making a decision about what to do. This is your decision. You don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with. If in doubt, talk to someone outside of your family such as your health care provider or counselor. Also, there are many organizations such as Planned Parenthood that offer free counseling, where you can discuss what your options are without any pressure.
  9. Think and do what’s right for you. Having a baby is a big decision. You’ll have to live with your choices and consequences for the rest of your life.

Your parents will most likely accept the fact that you’re pregnant because they love you. However, some parents may not be supportive. If you find that you’re not receiving the support you need from your parents, talk to your health care provider. There’s a lot of professional support out there available through different agencies.